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Shot of the Week: Apathetic Bartender Mixer

Author: Philippe
Posted: 14 Sep 2004

Welcome, one and all, to the second RNC Shot of the Week. As has already been explained, Tony and I were rocking the Republican National Convention trying to pimp our website to all the rich liberals from Long Island that we could find. Turns out we found a lot of them. However, we quickly got bored of them and decided that drinking would make the convention a lot more fun.

It did! And, in a mere two shots, I was buzzed.

The first shot was fun, and everyone involved was cool.

The second shot...well, the shot was good, anyway.

The man who gave us our liquor had sullen eyes and simply didn't care about life, the universe, or anything for that matter. Here was a man who had given up. He wouldn't even let us take a picture of him mixing it. Hell, he said we weren't even allowed to take pictures in the bar. Which of course Tony I don't think even heard (the guy was very soft spoken), and I just completely ignored because I hated him so much. He was a bitch, a bitch I shall call Johnny Bitchcakes and his Bitchtastic bar. there's no picture of him, here's what he looks like on the inside. A clown who makes people happy, but on the inside he's very sad. Also, he has explosive diarrhea.

I think his girlfriend had left him or something. Johnny Bitchcakes was completely apathetic to our needs. I hate him and I hate that bar.

The shot tasted like mangoes, though, and was pretty good. Here's how you make it.

  • 1 part Mount Gay Rum
  • 1 part Captain Morgan
  • 1 part mango juice
  • 1 part Amaretto

    All in all, I'd highly recommend the shot but not the bar. It's complicated though, so, oh, I don't know. It was very good, but just too damn complicated for a bartender to make anywhere. And nobody wants to go to a store and ask where they keep the mango juice. I give the thing a thumbs in the middle. Good shot. Crappy bar. Crappy bartender.


    The Coffeeshop Bar is located at
    29 Union Square West, New York, NY 10003.

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